So we are off and running in 2017!
How are you feeling? Are you exited, rocking and rolling with energy in the new year? Or, maybe you are experiencing some post-holiday fatigue/letdown? Either way, let me take a couple of minutes to tell you about a fun way to spend some quality time with your significant other as we start our initial approach towards Valentine’s Day.
How important is it to spend time and energy focusing on continually strengthening our marriages? In a word; extremely! Marriage is the backbone of our families, of our society. God provided a statement as to why He created a woman to go along with man, “The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’ ” (Genesis 2:18). From the very beginning, God intended for man and woman to support each other in marriage, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24).
Several popular verses about love, often used at weddings, come from Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” In our hectic lives, do we make it enough of a priority in our marriages to consistently focus on those beautiful truths of love?
Beyond our own husband/wife dynamics, maintaining a strong marriage is also crucial to the happiness and development of our children. Children are sponges, and sometimes a seemingly off-handed harsh comment (or even the tone of a comment) between a husband and wife can resonate as something that troubles a child, and sticks with them. Fortunately, children will also soak up all of the positive comments, acts of kindness, and other demonstrations of love that they see their parents engage in. This is important to keep in mind as we look to, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it” (Proverbs 22:6). When a child sees a loving relationship between their parents, that example will become engrained into their minds as the model for how a man should treat a woman (and vise-versa). When children grow up and start having their own romantic relationships, they often exhibit the same behaviors that they saw their parents model when they were those young sponges quietly watching and listening on the sidelines.
To recap, our marriages are the foundation of our human relationships (the first human relationships established by God), are based on our demonstrations of what love is (patient, kind, perseveres, etc.), and are crucial to the development of our children (the example we are modeling for them). Without question, it is essential that we strive to maintain loving marriages.
How do we continue to maintain and improve our marriages? First off, by being there as “suitable helpers” for each other, staying on the same page as we navigate the daily highs and lows of our earthly lives, and overall just “doing life” well with each other. Beyond successfully upholding the basic day-to-day responsibilities associated with choosing to go through life with a spouse, some next steps in maintaining and improving our marriages include taking the time to connect with each other in fully focused conversations, making space for some fun couple’s date time together, and in countless other romantic ways (brining home flowers, writing a love letter, making a special meal, etc.).
Here’s where I come in! I am leading Coupes Date Night events in 2017, focusing on taking groups of couples through a life coaching themed session. Together, husbands and wives will discuss areas of their marriage as I lead the group through the phases of a Christian Coaching session (awareness, vision, strategies/action steps, obstacles). These date night events are designed to be a fun, non-intimidating, way for couples to spend quality time together in a date setting, and also to position them to walk out of the event with a unified fresh perspective, and in an overall stronger position, within their marriages.
As we approach the holiday of Valentine’s Day, where we celebrate love, I encourage you to find a way to continue to grow the love in your marriage. Do it for your spouse, for your children, and for yourself. “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13).
May God bless you as you continue along your life journey!
About the Author:
Coach Shane is an International Coach Federation (ICF) trained life coach and graduate of the Certified Professional Life Coach (CPLC) program from the Christian Coach Institute (Charlotte, NC). He also holds a Bachelor’s Degree (BA) and Master’s Degree in Business Administration (MBA).
PHONE: (920) 428-1564
FACEBOOK: Shane Hansen, Christian Life Coach, LLC